Sannet lost custody of her two children – both under 12 years old – after remarrying.
A family court in Russia's North Caucasus region has ruled in favor of her ex-husband, who said he does not want her children to grow up with their stepfather.
Sannet's case is not unusual in this conservative, Muslim-majority region, where children are often considered the property of their fathers or their father's relatives.
These local beliefs conflict with Russian law. However, they shape judges' decisions, making custody impossible for many mothers in the event of divorce, remarriage, or if they become widowed.
During the hearing, Sannet said that the judge and her ex-husband's lawyer openly told her that she did not have the right to take care of the children because she had remarried.
"Even the ex-husband has remarried, but no one is saying that children shouldn't grow up with a stepfather," said Sannet, whose name has been changed to protect her identity.
"I was told that [unlike the mother's remarriage] the father's remarriage does not change the situation, and that the father should raise the children," said the 31-year-old, who now lives in the Russian region of Ingushetia.
The court granted Sannet the right to visit her daughter once a week and her son once a month. However, Sannet said that her ex-husband often does not allow her to see the children.
Sannet's ex-husband has taken her to court, demanding she pay $260 in alimony. The average salary in Ingushetia is $380, according to Russia's Federal Service for State Statistics.
The exact number of women who have lost custody of their children in this region is unknown. However, such cases are considered to be very widespread.
In 2021, the European Court of Human Rights (ECHR) ordered Russian authorities to reunite Chechen woman Luisa Tapayeva with her four minor children, who were taken into the care of their paternal grandfather when her husband died.
Tapayeva's father-in-law told her that her children "belong" to her husband's family. After failing to win custody of her children in Russia, Tapayeva took the case to the ECHR.
In its decision, the ECHR said that there have been similar cases in the past from the Russian region of the North Caucasus, mainly in Chechnya and Ingushetia.
A family lawyer in the region, who spoke to Radio Free Europe on condition of anonymity, said that many judges in Chechnya and Ingushetia are "influenced" by local norms, and apply them in decisions, rather than applying Russian law.
"The fathers' legal representatives in court proceedings cite the mothers' second marriage as a justification, as a card to win the case," the lawyer said briefly.
According to many Islamic scholars, mothers should enjoy custody of their children if they divorce and do not remarry. Fathers should provide financial support for their children, regardless of whether they remarry, according to the scholars.
"When I hear such arguments, I tell them that this is a secular court, and that they should go and find an Islamic court if they want the decision to be based on religion," the lawyer said.
"They tell me in the corridors that 'it is not tradition for children to remain under the care of the mother if she remarries'. I then ask them 'is it our tradition for them to receive alimony from the mother?' and they are left without an answer." REL (A2 Televizion)
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